Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Three Tales From the Crypt Episodes That Are Always Floating In The Back Of My Brain

1. Death of Some Salesmen- S.5 Ep. 1. starring Ed Begley, Jr, Tim Curry (x 3!)
  A down and dirty salesman(Begley, Jr.) peddles his wares at the wrong house. Who lives here? Why, Pa, Ma and Winona Brackett, of course, a delightfully insane family, all played by the wonderfully delightful Tim Curry. Begley learns a few lessons, and also a new meaning for "down and dirty."

2. Forever Ambergris- S.5 Ep. 3. starring Steve Buscemi, Roger Daltry, Lysette Anthony
  Daltry is a burnt out combat photographer who falls deep into lust with the luscious wife(Lysette) of the new kid in photography(Buscemi) When he sees his chance for a comeback, and a way to win the lovely Lysette, Daltry takes it, with some gory results. But don't worry, revenge is sweet. And nearly as gory.

3. Carrion Death- S.3 Ep. 2. starring Kyle MacLachlan
  Bad boy Earl(MacLachlan) is arrested for bank robbery and murder, and is then transported across the desert, handcuffed to a policeman, to be tried for his crimes. All hell breaks loose when Earl kills the cop, only to lose the handcuff keys down the cop's gullet. Now Earl and his "dead weight" are off on a different kind of trek across the desert, but the dead cop isn't Earl's only company on this particular trip.

*Bonus: On a Deadman's Chest- S.4 Ep. 3. starring Heavy D, Tia Carrere, and some other dudes.
  Lead Singer of a popular hard rock group is at odds with the new wife(Carrere) of the Guitar Player. He views her as Yoko Ono, she views him as an egomaniacal brat. When a Groupie hooks up our Lead Singer with a mysterious, one-eyed tattoo artist(D) things really come to a head. Murder, betrayal, and magic tattoos. And Tia Carrere's cleavage!(There is also a very obvious penis in this episode, which I rediscovered after renting this disk from Netflix)

Monday, September 10, 2012

Three Favourite Mystery Science Theater 3000 Episodes

1. Squirm (episode 1012) "Oh come on, nobody's that Southern."
Worms are zapped with electricity during a particularly bad thunderstorm, and this in turn makes them very ill-tempered. Many jokes about the south, the near translucent skin of our hero and heroine, and the heroine's gigantic sister.

2. The Touch of Satan (episode 908) "This is where the fish lives."
A young man on a cross country journey takes a turn down a dirt road, and meets the girl of his dreams. Or, is it his nightmares? Lots of bad hair jokes, and bad hair. Also, walnut farming, massive sweat stains, and a murderous granny. Or is she?

3. The Final Sacrifice (episode 910) "Rowsdower!"
Dorky boy finds map when searching through the attic for information about his missing father. A cult, led by a man with an amazingly strange voice(seriously, does he really talk like that in real life?) wants said map, and will stop at nothing to get it. Lots of Canada jokes, dorky kid jokes, and, of course, there is Rowsdower. The man, the myth, the legend. And his mullet.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Three Things I Do Not Like About My Kindle Touch

1. The "touch" part, at times. If I have lotion on my hands, or my hands are too cold, etc, then I have a hard time using  the touch screen. Flipping pages can be a pain.

2. Keeping track of what I am reading is a bit more difficult. As I mentioned in my last list, I tend to read more than one book at a time. With actual books, I have no problem keeping track of what I am reading. Because I have anywhere from 10 to 30 pages of books in my Kindle at any given time, I sometimes mix up titles or even flat out forget that I am in the midst of reading something.

3. It's simply not a book. As a lifelong reader, I constantly have a book in hand. The weight, the feel of the pages, even the smell of a book are all things I have grown up with. A Kindle simply cannot compare to that.